La vie à deux


I spoke little of my sentimental life since my separation and there is 5 years old. As a matter of fact, I had never experienced it (I couple since 10 years old) and I had so much talked about my couple that I knew not what to tell you.

I do not waver to my current rule and I will keep for me that I live for 5 years with those who now share my life. But so far now me desires to tell you about life in two.

I did the math and since my 18 years I stayed single only 6 mois. So 14 years old 1/2 that I only know couples. It's starting to make a small piece if I align 10 years then 5 to live in two, and I was recently told that I was definitely a dinosaur of the couple.

I'm not sure if it was a compliment or not, may not be elsewhere. But I care enough I like be a dinosaur of the couple. Oh it's not always easy to understand and to live together, but I grew up with the idea that the couple was the conflict (the family stuff) and not always a part of fun then I am awfully and pleasantly surprised to see that there is nothing.

I'm not going to lie to you, It asked me a lot of efforts and work on me to always have l ’ empathy necessary to put me instead of the other, support, do not let my small disappointments and frustration take over on the rest when everything is not perfect.

I have the impression to have changed a lot and learned these 5 last years and this is the large and small things I learned and made my life better during my 15 couple years (good attention, I ask myself in donor's lessons, It's more my felt staff).

Talk calmly and kindly in any circumstance. We can be angry after something, be upset, it's human. But speak poorly only leads to more annoyances. Even if I end internally, I try to keep my cool in the worst of times and always speak nicely to my lover. No insults, never . I find it crazy how people talk in general, I often hallucinates in stores (IKEA is the store number 1 where you hear couples send spikes).

To start, to start, to start. And then laugh not bad.

Knowing how to communicate his passions and not impose its joint (otherwise you end up in an episode of so true :D). More seriously I do not share the passions of my guy, but the fact that it is passionate about lot of things(even different) both enough for me. And from time to time we learn stuff, When you are well prepared for this.

Play in the same team, support each other, never turn your back on the other when it is in a bad passes, even if it's hard. It is in difficult moments it creates the strongest links.

Say a franc Hello with a smile every day, even in the morning when you're grumpy.

Accept lie angry. Before I thought always need to be reconciled before going to sleep. But I was wrong, with my temperament I need to calm me to see things differently. Now when a shouting match farts evening, I leave the outcome to the next morning. Once calmed it sounds well stupid and skips to another thing quickly. Nothing good comes out under the coup anger, It is climbing. Unless one of them is able to descend quickly and soothe both.

Make hugs everyday.

Listen to and understand, put in place the other when one is angry, show d ’ empathy in all circumstances. It's sometimes difficult when one is confused by the anger, But reaching to put the finger on which prevents to understand is often beneficial.

Never listen to the views of others, except the closest friends who wish you well when it is hard to see clearly. No one knows what is really happening within a couple and everyone lives different experiences.

Devote time, privileged moments. By dint of being every day, is sometimes passed to the second plan some rendezvous that should always reserve. Have a weekly activity in common is pretty cool, with my boyfriend we always draw a night together.

Dance together, any time, No matter how, even if it's in the kitchen on the generic person doesn't move on arte :D


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52 "comments on"La vie à deux

  1. 30 May 2016 at 10:07

    It is nice article I found…
    I recognize myself squarely in the dinosaur's couple's life term and because it will soon 15 years I am pair with my lover that I met when I was 17 ans..
    I can't go to bed angry, anyway I do not sleep if the situation is not appeased, at the time it may end late at night!!
    I wish you full of happiness for your life of torque in any case!

  2. Ophelia OC
    30 May 2016 at 10:07

    I fully share your vision and your “recommendations”; Dinosaurs Girls forever :)

  3. Lola Mdg
    30 May 2016 at 10:09

    Bastien Rnt ❤️

    • Bastien Rnt
      30 May 2016 at 10:18

      S’tu veux on peut dessiner tous les soir, mais quitte à faire je préfère composer pendant que tu gribouilles <3

    • Lola Mdg
      30 May 2016 at 10:18

      Ben c’est parfait comme on fait déjà quand tu joues de la basse et que je gribouille ☺️ faudrait juste que je sois moins grognon par contre🙈

  4. 30 May 2016 at 10:14

    Ton article tombe bien, ça fait 2ans et demi ou 3ans que je suis avec mon copain et en ce moment c’est un peu la guerre froide à l’appartement, je travaille dans la restauration depuis janvier pour financer des futures études, suddenly it requires us to have life in offbeat rhythms that we not connaissaons not lot of people in the region where we are and it is hard to have to live with the professional constraints of each, reduced friendly surroundings and few activities. (because no car + no big salary).

    When I look back I was also very little single 6 months after I found someone, his, It was wonderful, but then I have trouble to found a ground to hear so we are all both wound to the other…He was especially criticized me of not much the helped the daily, It is intermittent du spectacle at the time he spends bcp more time to the apartment than me and it creates a huge lag….In short I hope that it will improve…..

    In any case your article do good to read I hope your happiness will continue for a long time :)

  5. 30 May 2016 at 10:19

    It's funny because there are many things with which I agree in your article but here it doesn't work quite like that, I think that really it depends on the characters.
    We are together since our 15 years and it is therefore 17 years and we when it farts there insults but it folded rarely angry. We always burst abscesses because anyway I can't do otherwise.
    Longevity has several recipes I think but ours is freedom. Never it is mutual crisis on our hobby for example, I'm not whining because he plays to the console with his buddies you see ! It will not hollering because I sew. It is free, out everyone on our side but we meet at other times. There was no jealousy, competition. The base is solid and healthy. And we laugh a lot also. Our values are common and it helps not bad I think !

  6. Alexandrine Delavaux
    30 May 2016 at 10:29

    This article is perfect <3

  7. 30 May 2016 at 10:34

    I'm couple since more of 8 years and I really agree with you.
    Besides ' with time do you realize that there is also a social with the torque pressure when you're a dinosaur – or a mamouth (No but guys, serious, Let breathe us) with questions of the kind “You don't want to go elsewhere? You are going to marry you? you are going to have children? It is the man in your life? (nan mais j’en sais rien moi!!!)
    Bref, I live a beautiful story because we love deeply and you need to know to take care of the other daily, by some small attention, an impromptu hugs in the hallway, make jokes and the kids of 8 years as… Nevertheless it can enfoirer at any time and should keep it in mind, but it is what is beautiful in love I think…
    It is nice to have felt tone, thank you <3

  8. 30 May 2016 at 10:36

    What Nice article and I recognize myself in couple also dinosaur hihi I have the same 6 months of celibacy since kindergarten ahha
    I also discovered recently with my husband- We are together since 7 yrs- that we could fall asleep on a disagreement and calmly set the next day! A revelation for me ;)
    Otherwise our happiness routine is to wake up 30 minutes earlier and spend this half hour into the arms of the other has to wake up gently on bottom of radio. And really starting each day with such a dose of love and cuddles, CA makes it all easy!

    Thank you for sharing ;)

  9. Jessica Cmbrd
    30 May 2016 at 10:41

    I agree with you but to tell the truth it is surtt men who do not bcp effort…

    • Ariel Katowice
      30 May 2016 at 10:45

      Any reductive lol as reflection…

    • 30 May 2016 at 10:47

      For my part I have always been with guys who were so much effort if it is no longer ;)

    • Emilie Bacher
      30 May 2016 at 11:12

      Jessica, that is wrong.. the stereotype of the guy without heart please much to writers of (bad) movies and series, mais ça n’est pas la vraie vie. Des personnes égoïstes qui ne font pas d’effort, il y en a chez les hommes, oui, et chez les femmes aussi.

    • Jessica Cmbrd
      30 May 2016 at 11:27

      Je suis tomber que sur ce genre là alors

    • David Duris
      30 May 2016 at 11:47

      Merci d’avoir pris notre défense les filles :)

      Jessica faut que tu améliores le processus de sélection de tes conquêtes ;)

    • Jessica Cmbrd
      30 May 2016 at 11:52

      Ok David Duris sûrement xD mais j’ai pas la recette :p

    • Marie-Christine Tammik
      30 May 2016 at 12:29

      I do not agree, dans mon couple et dans mon entourage je retrouve très souvent des mecs qui font énormément d’efforts et qui supportent beaucoup ;)

      Il suffit de trouver le bon 👌🏻

    • David Duris
      30 May 2016 at 12:48

      Ça prend du temps. It has all the same pb men too. It will come with the time don't worry ;)

    • Jessica Cmbrd
      30 May 2016 at 13:00

      thank you anyway

    • 31 May 2016 at 10:06

      ah ah pour connaitre bon nombre de couples lesbiens je peux t’affirmer que l’égoïsme, bad faith and lack of listening are absolutely not longer the preserve of a kind to another ;-)
      It is same with the received ideas of the couple's style, only children do not know to share, the guys do not know to listen to, the girls are bordelic / or / maniacs of the storage, gays do not want to engage, lesbians are desperate to install couple at the end of 5 days etc.…etc…

  10. 30 May 2016 at 10:41

    an article full of wisdom !
    I retain control of negative emotions (I do not say to somatiser them, CA it is bad, but control them as much as possible). This is my default and it put me in crappy situations where after I paddled a bit to bring back the other :D

  11. 30 May 2016 at 10:46

    26 years of marriage and 27 years together, I am more than a dinosaur! It had a rich life but not smooth, a life made getaways and romantic restaurant, bowling and video games with our 4 children, Holiday camping or in the family, disputes sometimes and big hugs, love but not all pink just one who makes us calm and happy. I doubted sometimes, married to 19 years we change as we age… But when I look, I have no regrets, love! My children cry for spending time with us, suddenly we have still not sold the 6 places! And you're right, We must laugh and respect. Share but not all impose. Long life to your couple

  12. Kay Bee
    30 May 2016 at 10:46

    I am disappointed that we are not the only dancing in the kitchen :-)

  13. 30 May 2016 at 10:49

    I love this very nice article. I agree with many things (Dinosaur from 13 years for me !) but I have great difficulty in putting them into practice. I work above but do not talk badly when I am very angry and to empathize in any circumstance….. It's not easy all the time :-(
    But I'll get there !

  14. Maude Norris
    30 May 2016 at 11:14

    Thanks Eleanor for this post. Separate a few days ago, I would have well experienced everything again and again. ❤

  15. Emilie Bacher
    30 May 2016 at 11:28

    I agree with all your conclusions! Talk calmly, laugh, hugs (and kisses!) everyday, accept lie faches (After a night's sleep we forget), do not listen to others… I would add also agree to do things one without the other, namely find themselves only occasionally if needed.

  16. 30 May 2016 at 11:35

    a nice article on living in two… I share enough your feelings, and even if it does not work all in the same way as we have temperaments that differ, the keys that you give to live well its torque are good : Empathy, Listening, Sharing, Right to be angry, Friendliness-respect. Besides whether a couple fusional or very free, I do not hesitate to say “good” because if I analyze my previous relationships that have not walked, or couples of friends who clashes; He was still missing a (or two, even three) of these concepts. Of course there is the amouuuuuur, but the feeling of love strong and deep as, can not all set and I have often found it although naive to rely on it to be well in married life. (Oh the old wisdom of counter ^^)

  17. Bérénice Lny
    30 May 2016 at 11:37

    Very nice article ! :)

  18. 30 May 2016 at 11:40

    And well you made for couples, It is undeniable ! You are all wisdom, attention and any withholding, It is very well to get there. I know from experience that it's really the job, work on oneself. Moi aussi, I hear in stores, Street, the train sometimes very hurtful words of some couples and I know that they will not be erased… that this will leave traces…I always find it hard to understand why people are so… Bravo also for the magic dress, you were very nice in these photos !

  19. 30 May 2016 at 12:02

    good advice, It is true that it is better to avoid insults and think before speaking to not hurt the person.

  20. IZnabelle From Everywhere
    30 May 2016 at 12:14

    I agree.

  21. 30 May 2016 at 12:20

    Dance ??? Vraiment ? too strong ;) :p
    Good even when you did me marvel in one of my a-priori ' children of parents divorced blah blah blah’ ;)

    In any case good dance into the vortex of life to you 2,
    I have the impression that your siblings you as well run-in empathy arf !!! :D

  22. Marie-Charlotte Raj
    30 May 2016 at 12:20

    Very nice article ❤️

  23. 30 May 2016 at 12:42

    Here is an article both moving and clairvoyant ! :-D

    I quite agree with you on the subject to speak nicely in all circumstances and especially during disputes.
    More than ever, in the life of couple, the adage ” the words kill” is so true.
    I experienced this with my ex who I was for 4 years old. During the disputes on ( enfin, especially me…) be sent the worst horrors in figure. In the heat of the moment, It does not well realize that these words are as much damage that will reactivate and toil to heal in every future dispute.
    We are going to rehash the words of each other in mode : ” Why did say that ?”, even when the dispute will be passed and believed to have forgotten.
    Little by little, mutual respect, that it is and that it must be, will crumble.

    With my current Darling, We put everything on respect, politeness and humility to apologize if one was severe or shortly in empathy with the other :-D

  24. 30 May 2016 at 12:46

    Nice text, I have always very difficult to go to bed angry :(

  25. Pauline Plsnce
    30 May 2016 at 14:13

    Dance together, même si c’est dans la cuisine ❤️

  26. 30 May 2016 at 15:31

    hihihi, Dinosaur of the couple, When Owl expressions.
    I find your article very relevant and I sur-valide the last point, We rock for a few years now and it has done much advanced our couple.

  27. 30 May 2016 at 15:46

    too beautiful this article… :)

  28. 30 May 2016 at 17:12

    Dinosaur of the couple ! It's great that expression :)
    The same, that lengthy stories : 4 years with my high school boyfriend 9 years with my ex husband and there 4 years with my husband for life <3
    I wish you full of happiness and kitchen dance !

  29. 30 May 2016 at 18:22

    That's so true ,I loved reading your article. It describes well the life of couple : faux pas of the beginning and especially what is true laughter all day it's true that laughter is very important in life in General.

    Kisses and good luck <3

    Pauline's blog

  30. 30 May 2016 at 18:52

    I love this kind of article that takes happiness =)
    I do not have the same experience as you, but I really believe that communication is what allows many things, and put in a comprehensive approach.
    This summer I moved with my darling, and I have only a single hurry, is to have the pleasure of seeing her face every morning even without having bus coffee =) I think that it is also ca love '!

  31. 30 May 2016 at 20:06

    Pretty ticket ! If everyone could have this vision of the couple, CA arrange lot …
    Then dancing and laughing, it's life !

  32. 30 May 2016 at 20:27

    Thanks for this article and I can't find you to be a dino of the couple, I find it nice to stay together despite the small hassles and another annoyance. With my lover makes 9 years that are set and 8 that you live together. It has not always been easy every day, and such that you for me a shouting match to expire before we went to sleep. Little by little I learned to be more serene and I have accomplished things with him and his way of pushing me to go further. On est soudé et on est là l’un pour l’autre. And since 5 mois on vit une nouvelle aventure d’expatriés aux USA!

  33. Enzo Bertino
    30 May 2016 at 21:25

    C’est vrai 💘

  34. Noémie Tomas
    30 May 2016 at 21:26

    Totalement 💘

  35. Johanna Samy Maartens
    30 May 2016 at 23:49

    J’adore cet article 😍❤
    13 ans de couple avec le même homme. On m’a dit que j’avais raté ma vie et que j’étais passé à côté de ma jeunesse.
    Pour l’instant je constate juste que je ne suis pas passée à côté de mon âme soeur ❤

    • 31 May 2016 at 8:50

      oooooh ce commentaire ! <3

  36. C’est un article bien mignon!
    C’est pareil pour moi j’ai dû être célibataire 6 mois… Un grosse relation de 15 ans et celle actuelle d’une petite année. We are trying to make a lot of things from your list, and even if it's sometimes hard, CA change a lot of things on a daily basis and makes the most beautiful life.


  37. 2 June 2016 at 11:20

    C’est une très belle histoire

  38. 2 June 2016 at 11:33

    Posts pretty and nice tips.
    I understand that you protect you from the intrusive side of internet (that creates a false impression of proximity and sometimes/often people feel allowed to comment very inappropriately, you have unfortunately made the costs…)
    Suddenly thanks to share with us what that the years have taught you

  39. 2 June 2016 at 22:26

    So far, 14 years with the same. Is cumulated labels “dinosaurs of couple's life”, “never separated”, “not married”.

    Do any short mouth regardless of the time, It is unbearable for me. My shock argument : you are going to that in not even get drunk with nonsense as you make reverse, plant by a smoothie and I what as last conversation memory ? a very rotten trick. Fail-safe method that works in both directions.
    The only time actually was at ikea to compose a kitchen. CA it is finished in “If this keeps your kitchen you you do it only because I will not take”. It went to Leroy hake where a charming Advisor took everything in hand. Saved !

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